17 June 1994. Chicago. Soldier Field packed to the brim — more than 63,000 people in the open air. The first World Cup in history on American soil. In the stands is President Bill Clinton. On the microphone is the legendary Oprah Winfrey. On the pitch are hundreds of dancers in white, confetti, balloons, the thunder of drums.

And somewhere in this entire spectacle is a woman in a red suit who runs the length of the pitch to her own hit song and is about to take a penalty. Her name is Diana Ross. The voice of the legendary group The Supremes and an icon of the era, with more than 100 million records sold in her career.

In front of her is a specially constructed goal, which, according to the script, is supposed to fall apart spectacularly after her shot and goal. The goalkeeper already knows he will concede. The only problem is that nobody warned the ball.

‘That is how kids kick.’ Ross missed, the goal collapsed, and the Chilean commentator laughed

Ross sprints across the pitch — and even at this stage something goes wrong. In one of the verses she forgets to raise the microphone to her lips. Never mind: she has a more important task. The goalkeeper is ahead of her. By the way, he is unknown. The Athletic tried to track him down but failed.

Around the penalty area there are at least 25 dancers, a cameraman with a megaphone, two running cameramen, the man who will pull the cable on the goalframe, and some figure with a clipboard in the right‑hand corner of the shot.

Ross’s run‑up is, to put it mildly, unorthodox. Backwards, forwards, backwards again. Then a huge step towards the ball. Her plant foot comes down not quite next to it. Her torso leans back. Her kicking leg slices the ball. And it goes a metre wide of the left post.

The goal collapses exactly as planned. The ball does not go in, but who cares?

Former Brentford shooting coach Bartek Sylwestrzak analysed Ross’s technique for The Athletic: “She hit the ball like someone who had never done it before. A tell‑tale sign is the very pronounced hip flexion. That is how children strike. Or professionals with their weaker foot.”

Psychologist Geir Jordet — a penalty consultant for Chelsea, Arsenal, Liverpool and Bayern Munich — has his own view: singing to a backing track, moving in time to the music and striking the ball accurately are three different tasks for the brain that do not combine well. And on top of that, she was sprinting under the gaze of 63,000 people in the stadium and 750 million TV viewers.

Jordet later suggested an unexpected theory: “The goalkeeper was surely nervous. He was afraid of accidentally saving the ball and ruining the show for everyone. Imagine the fame you could gain by stopping Diana Ross’s penalty at a World Cup opening ceremony. Perhaps she missed on purpose — as an act of goodwill.”

The commentators’ reactions were amusing too. Briton John Helm on TSN chuckled on air and came out with a couple of lines: “A disaster. I am not sure that is how it was supposed to be.” His BBC colleague Alan Green was more restrained: “Diana Ross has just taken a penalty… and missed. A doubtful omen.” Brazilian Galvao Bueno on Globo quipped: “It did not go very well, but at least she smashed the goal. Absolutely American.” The Chilean commentator said nothing — he just laughed for several seconds live on air.

The ceremony descended into chaos: Oprah fell into a hatch, and Clinton sat in the blazing sun

While Ross was running across the pitch, chaos was unfolding behind the scenes and in the stands.

The ceremony’s host was the first to suffer. Oprah Winfrey announced Ross’s entrance — and immediately fell into a hatch in the stage. “I fell down into a huge hole, shredded my legs and could not get out — but I could hear Diana singing,” she later recalled. Four men pulled her out, bandaged her leg and Oprah limped back onto the stage.

The same hatch cost singer Jon Secada his health. A dancer failed to close it before his entrance, Secada fell and dislocated his shoulder. He performed his entire number injured, as if nothing had happened.

Things were wild in the stands too. The US president’s area was not cordoned off, and when Pelé appeared in the VIP section, fans climbed over twenty rows to get closer. Ceremony director Scott LaTellier personally held the crowd back with his arms.

A peanut seller became a meme when he wandered into the presidential section, recognised Clinton and shouted: “Hey, Bill! Want some peanuts?” — and was already poised to throw the packet. Secret Service agents grabbed him at the last moment. “I had just seen the end of my life,” LaTellier later joked.

Clinton himself spent the entire first half of the opening match, Germany vs Bolivia, in the open air, wearing a borrowed volunteer’s cap, under a blazing sun with not a single canopy. He was forced to stay because Chancellor Helmut Kohl flatly refused to go up to the VIP box. The US president flushed, sweated and endured.

***

Four hundred and seventy‑six days later, Ross performed at the opening of the Rugby World Cup in London. She sang, danced and drove around the pitch in a vintage car. But she no longer came within 20 metres of a ball.

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